Becomming Me.

Seventh Grade.

I was the girl with dark makeup covering my eyes. I was the quiet girl. I was the girl with head phones on, every second possible. I was the sad girl. I was the girl with no plans. I was the girl who hurt at the thought of her past. I was the girl who was alone in a room full of people. I was the girl who hated herself. I was the girl who cut a star into her ankle to prove a point. I was the girl who kept cutting it. I was the girl who was lost. I was the girl with dark clothes, who died her hair any time she could. I was the girl who was afraid to smile. I was the girl who ran to the wrong person for help. I was the girl who gave up everything for a guy. I was the girl who lost the only person that had ever cared about her. I was the girl who gave her best friend away. I was the girl who cried in her room. I was the girl who blasted her music so loud, just to sleep without thinking too much. I was the girl they were afraid of.

Eighth Grade.

I was the girl with nothing to lose. I was the girl who realized it was time to change. I was the girl who met a good guy. I was the girl who found new friends. I was the girl who cared so much about what they said. I was the girl who covered up her past. I was the girl who lied about everything. I was the girl they loved.I was the confident girl. But, I was the girl with a wall around her heart. I was the who let almost no one in. I was still the girl with that little reminder on her ankle.

Ninth Grade.

I was the girl who changed her everything for him. I was the girl who believed every word from his mouth. I was the girl who never spoke. I was the girl with a jealous boy friend. I was the girl who spent every possible second with him. I was the girl with no friends. I was the girl with A's and B's. I was the girl who no one knew. I was the girl who didn't know who she was. I was the girl who cried every day. I was the girl who never slept. I was the girl who thought she was in love. I was the girl who was afraid to be anything other than what he wanted. I was the girl who changed herself for all the wrong reasons.

Tenth Grade.

I was the girl who finally saw who she had become. I was the girl who saw the world in a different light. I was the girl who was tired of loneliness. I was the girl who did something about it. I was the girl who changed everything to be who she knew she was meant to be. I was the girl who stopped believing what everyone wanted her to. I was the girl who loved who she was. I was the girl happy with life. I was the girl who made new friends every day. I was the girl who couldn't stop smiling. I was the girl who was proud of her scars. I was the girl who didn't care what anyone said. I was the girl her own goals. I was the girl who lived her life the way she wanted. I was the girl with black nail polish and dark clothes, because that's what she wanted. I was the girl who stopped holding back. I was the girl who said what she thought. I was the girl who never planned anything. I was the girl who did her own thing. I was the girl who saw her beauty. I was the girl who stopped letting her past prevent her happiness. I was the girl who was strong. I was the girl who knew what she wanted, and did what she could to get it.

Eleventh Grade.



...to be continued.

Who I am.

I am a daughter. I am a sister. I am a friend. I am a lover. I am a student. I am crazy. I am outspoken. I am opinionated. I am selfish. I am strong. I am careless. I am beautiful. I am loud. I am smart. I am determined. I am skinny. I love music and sound. I love the color orange. I love movies. I love a good book. I love innocence. I love driving. I love summer nights. I love grass. I love sleeping. I love having someone to talk to. I love how I feel after a long day of work. I love bubble baths. I love incense. I love the stars, and reading my horoscope. I love my sister. I love my gross KIA. I love my past. I love being spontaneous. I love kisses. I love jamming out in my room alone. I love walking in the park with Brandie. I love car adventures with Tony. I love under the bridge with Paul and Dillon. I love not talking to Joshua until I'm with Nana. I love Cait putting her make up on in my car. I love Red Bull. I love long days of work where Monica forgets her own thoughts. I love seeing pictures of Beth with her SONS. I love my mom singing country music in the car. I love my Aunt using her kitty voice. I love my dad talking for hours on the phone. I love walking to the bus stop in the snow. I love the sunrise with Dillon and Paul. I love dreams about nothing. I love forgetting my locker combo after Christmas break. I love the first two days of school. I love how my parents can have a whole conversation about nothing at all. I love Cait being married to Pete. I love how I'm the youngest person in my whole family. I love Ashlei being so strong. I love lightning and thunder. I love rain. and puddles. I love 719. I love shorts and tank tops, the windows down driving nowhere. I love Brandie. I love Ashlei. I love Caitlin. I love Beth. I love Nana. I love Dillon. I love Tony. I love Joshua. I love Paul. I love my mom. I love my dad. I love my family.

I love my life.